Father Stephen Schreiber, campus minister at Kennedy Catholic High School, was the sponsor for Ryan Loreno at St. Michael Parish in Greenville.

“I think sometimes kids feel like we’re making them jump through a lot of hoops in order to get confirmed,” says Elaine Shearer, who has been director of religious education at St. Michael Parish in Greenville for the last seven years. “But that’s really not what it’s about,” she explains.

“For instance, we ask our students to complete part of their service hours at the parish. They might help teach Vacation Bible School in the summer, they might volunteer to stuff FaithLife into our Sunday bulletins or they might become lectors or join the choir.” Shearer is not interested in having young people mindlessly fulfill requirements.

“What we’re doing,” she says, “is inviting them to begin understanding what it means to be an adult member of the Catholic Church.

What is confirmation really all about? “Every year, I have young people in class who tell me they can’t be confirmed because there are a few church teachings they are not sure they agree with. I always tell them, ‘I still have questions! That’s how you grow in your spirituality and in your Catholicism,’” Elaine says.  No one is expecting a teenager to grasp all the intricate teachings and mysteries of the living, breathing Catholic Church. Theologians, saints and scholars have given their lives to this effort for more than 2000 years.

Many young people are surprised to discover that they actually became members of the church when they received the sacrament of baptism. In the early church, people were baptized and confirmed at the same time. As the church grew in number, priests welcomed new members of the church by baptizing with water; that initiation would be completed by the bishop with an anointing the next time he traveled to the area. Eventually the two rites became distinct sacraments.

A bishop has flexibility in deciding when young people in his diocese should be confirmed. After consulting with religious educators, pastors and others from the Erie Diocese, Bishop Trautman has come to believe that junior year in high school is the ideal age to confirm students. “This is the time when young people really need God’s grace,” Bishop Trautman says. “It’s a time when they can benefit from the opportunity to reaffirm their faith and to ratify the decision their parents made for them at baptism.”

Recognizing that teenagers are very busy in their junior year, Bishop Trautman says it is a matter of priorities. “I believe it’s a question of understanding all that God is offering to us through our faith,” he explains. “God has done so much for our young people, endowing them with gifts and talents and education and opportunities. This is a chance for them to reflect on their lives and to make a choice to follow Jesus with gratitude.”

Bishop Trautman is concerned that those who chose not to investigate their parish confirmation programs are missing a great opportunity to be sanctified by God. “I want to encourage them to see how important God is in their lives and to strive for balance. Most young people manage it very well, and once they begin the process, they meet others and form friendships with their peers who are participating with great joy.”

A last word of advice on the subject from the bishop: “Preparing for confirmation is really the beginning of your adult formation,” he explains. “Don’t see it as an ending. It’s really just the beginning of your discipleship, of your witnessing and your faith.”

Thinking about selecting a sponsor?
Here are some tips to consider

In a perfect world, the church encourages young people to choose one of their godparents as a confirmation sponsor. This is not always practical, however, for a number of reasons. Perhaps they have moved away, perhaps they are no longer practicing their faith. Here are some thoughts to consider as you begin to think about selecting your confirmation sponsor:

• Choose someone with whom you feel comfortable discussing just about anything. Faith is very personal, and it’s not always easy to talk about the questions we have.
• Choose someone you see as a person of strong faith.
• It’s easier to choose someone who lives nearby, but if he or she lives far away, and fits everything else you’re looking for, make sure it’s someone you can talk to frequently on the phone or by e-mail.
• Some people pick a friend or a sibling who was recently confirmed. This is allowed, but keep in mind you are looking for spiritual maturity. Age is not as important as whether or not your sponsor can be a solid sounding board for your spiritual formation.

Here are additional Canon Law requirements for your sponsor:

• Your sponsor must be a Catholic who has received the Eucharist and been confirmed; he or she must be a practicing Catholic who attends Mass on Sundays and holy days.
• Your sponsor must be at least 16 years old.
• You may not choose one of your parents.
• If your sponsor is married, he or she must be in a marriage recognized by the church; if single, your sponsor should be living a chaste life in accordance with the Gospel.

How can parents help?

1. Attitude is everything. Help your child fulfill his or her requirements for confirmation with an open mind and heart. The process can last anywhere from one to three years, depending on your parish. Encourage your teen to embrace the opportunities being offered; classes, retreats, service projects and taking on new roles at the parish are all designed to help your child awaken to the responsibilities of a maturing Catholic. Try to help your child move beyond the idea of simply checking off all the requirements in order to “qualify” for confirmation.

2. Begin moving into the position of trusted guide for your child. “That’s easier said than done!” you’re probably thinking. But the best way to guide is by example. Are you other-centered? Do you look for opportunities to prepare a meal for someone in need, to volunteer with scouts or at school, to phone a friend who’s daughter is serving in the military? Do you attend Mass regularly? Actions do speak louder than words.

3. Kids need support and encouragement at this moment. If they have questions you can’t answer, help them get connected with those who can. “A lot of kids feel they can’t ask questions or speak about what’s really in their hearts because adults are quick to give them answers in black and white. But as they mature, they need to see that it’s important to listen, discern and grow in faith. Once again, actions speak louder than words. This is a good time for parents to recommit themselves to their own spiritual growth.

4. Remind your children that confirmation is not graduation. “Religious formation and spirituality don’t end until you end,” Elaine Shearer says. “It’s a lifelong process.”

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