Father Chris Singer starts the morning session of Family Honor as he introduces Steve Sabback, a presenter.

With rare 80-degree weather outside in mid-April, more than 70 adults and middle schoolers attended a day-and-a-half indoor seminar on Family Honor and chastity at St. George Church, Erie. No one left early to enjoy the weather. It was that important, and now as the weather warms up, the interest in Family Honor is snowballing.

“It’s like a pipe dream that became reality,” said Mary Lou McCall, director of the Family Honor affiliate team in the Erie Diocese. “When we first learned about this program and attended a seminar a year ago, we hoped that maybe in a few years, we’d have an affiliate and conduct our own programs. It’s happened much faster, and we’re going to have at least one full team in six months.”

What’s Family Honor all about? It started in 1987 when concerned parents formed an independent, nonprofit organization in Columbia, S. C. The big concern was the increasingly-distorted media images kids see of the human body and the gift of sexuality. Parents banded together and searched for methods to teach concepts of chastity and Pope John Paul II’s Theology of the Body without being preachy.

Father Chris Singer, the parochial vicar at St. George Church, explained the program promotes real love and real life experiences while helping parents start the dialog.

“With all the messages out there, parents can feel defeated before they even start,” he said. “This brings parents and seventh and eighth graders together to discuss the meaning and beauty of the gift of sexuality at an age-appropriate level.”

Father Chris credited an industrious St. George team that looked at many programs before choosing Family Honor to present to Bishop Trautman to gain his approval. “He overwhelmingly approved it, and the reason this will work here is because of the groundwork our lay people have done,” he added. “We have forward-thinking parishioners.”

The informative presentation starts with a basic understanding of the human body and incorporates entertaining and interactive skits and activities into the curriculum. The groups separate into male and female subgroups for frank and explicit discussions of male-female relationships, and then come back together for more interactive discussions of appropriate dress and behavior outside of marriage. Finally, marriage and the importance of the gift of chastity are discussed.

Ordinarily, presentations take place in four classes over a few weeks, but this first session at St. George took place Friday evening and all-day Saturday to accommodate the presenters from South Carolina.

Mary Lou’s husband, John, attended with one of their three daughters, and said he was impressed with the presenters — lay people who have regular jobs and do this on the side. He felt they handled the curriculum well. “They seamlessly segued into difficult subjects, and when we broke into our male group, we got down to the nitty-gritty answers to written questions submitted anonymously by the kids and adults.” Barb Pulice, a team leader, attended with her daughter and agreed.

“It opens communication,” she said. “Kids need to hear that we parents do care, and it helps to hear that from somebody else.”

Kimberly Danylko, who attended with her twin daughters, concurs, “I hate that we have to talk about this already, it’s so hard to brief them on this subject. But this was a great presentation and so age-appropriate — we all learned something.”

The presentation at St. George was the first in the diocese and in the state, but there will be many more. Family Honor is designed as an affiliate program that trains teams of presenters and certifies them to present the curriculum to their own schools or parishes.

Mary Lou, Father Chris and Sue Luteran — all of St. George — are well on their way to becoming presenters after completing six months of training last year with study-at-your-own-pace computer and online classes and assignments that culminated in a final weekend in South Carolina to finish the program. “We pulled a lot of late nights, but we did it,” Mary Lou said.

During the session at St. George, the three Erie team members completed the final step of watching the South Carolina team conduct a full program — something they will do in the near future, and the excitement is building.

What do the kids think? During social time on Friday night, Mary Lou said most kids were saying, “My mom made me do this.” But, by Saturday, the group of laughing teens was participating in discussions and engaging in conversation with peers and parents. The positive results keep coming in as buzz about the program spreads across the diocese. A St. Marys group that attended the spring session at St. George was so enthused that group leader Aaron Pfoutz says a second Erie Diocese team is 98 percent complete in the St. Marys area.

The program has an extended life that goes well beyond today’s teens and parents. Andy Heinlein, a Millcreek teacher and coach whose four children are all under the age of 9, wants to see his kids participate in Family Honor, and he plans to participate, too.

“I attended as an observer, and it was an impressive message,” he said. “Kids hear far too often about everything they can’t do. This teaches them, and us, what we can do.”

For more information on Family Honor, visit www.familyhonor.org or contact Mary Lou McCall at 814.866-3273.

Stories and photos by Pam Parker

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